So. The upside to feeling sad feelings and processing old* sad feelings is that if opens the heart up for more good feelings. Or positive feelings. Or more pleasant feelings…. Although I find the supposedly positive, pleasant stuff to be even harder and scarier than the “negative” feelings, just because I am used to feeling miserable.
IN OTHER NEWS. Making bizcochitos with my Amazing Child tonight. It’s for a school project on family traditions. Talking to both my parents about them, and receiving pictures of them eating their own batches has been indescribably sweet.
I’m enjoying the wine–was able to share a couple glasses with a friend, or a lady who might be on the way to ‘friend’ earlier. The rest is for the cookies.
I may update later with a picture of my outfit… I’m feeling insecure bc all of the mirror placements reveal more about my home–eg that it is messy and unorganized–than I want too…. But HEY it’s my life you know? And I am (unlike my amazing mother in law whom I’m only slightly in awe/crazy jealous of) healing my stuff around comfort and functionality in the home…but the reality is, well, not always attractive. Or something I’m proud of.
Anyways, one of my (attractive) school mom friends was all “Hey pretty lady, want to go out?” when I traipsing around school in my heels with my hair down (hey I had to go grocery shopping….) and I was quite amused because I would totally take her up on her offer if I thought she was the least bit serious.
*I suppose this, the Neck Thing, or something similar was too be expected. I’m completely shifting my foundation; instead of denying my Light and going with the crappy day job, I’m really, truly going for this Practice thing (oh goddess PUHLEASE) and that is requiring fundamental shifts in SO MANY WAYS. Including going back to a not so crappy part time day job. Who knows. Maybe I’m just full of sh*t.
Anyways, my teacher, or one of them, Havi Brooks, lost the functioning of both of her arms when she started her business. I was kind of expecting something to happen and the neck stuff makes sense to me.